I wrote this post a couple of days ago, and even published it. But I deleted it about 10 seconds later. For some reason it just didn’t feel right. It took a couple of days to figure out why. It’s the labels! I’m not a big fan of spiritual labels and I felt a little resistance come up when I re-read the post. Regardless, here it is again. Because I do love those springtime birds. 🙂
For the past few weeks the morning birds have been a saving grace. I live on the edge of a huge park and, starting at 5am, their sweet chirping melodies serve as my introduction to a brand new day.
According to the spiritually-focused posts I’ve been keeping up with, May is a month to integrate all the intense energy shifts of April. In my case, this has resulted in a lack of desire to blog or write at all (till now). My cells are flooded with information…but I’m not sure what to do with any of it.
Many channellings refer to this being a time where ‘lightworkers’, ‘divine changemakers’, and ‘wayshowers’ can finally step into their true roles as creators and leaders of a New Earth. Our efforts have paid off: we can live our dreams, we’ve ascended while still in 3D, and we are being supported like never before.
On a deep level, I’ve always been very excited by these concepts – some of these writings resonate in my soul, as truth.
But – what does it really mean, to be a divine changemaker, to lead others in this way? What does that actually look like, as we evolve? (And to what extent is ego at play in all of this?)
I was walking home from work the other day and found myself saying aloud, ‘It’s too much pressure’. In that moment I realized that I’ve been creating some pretty grandiose ideals and visions for myself based on how my life ‘should’ look by now, given all the choices and cosmic energies available to me in these potent times.
And maybe I’m just not ready for them.
For example, my job. I do feel that it’s time to move on, and I know I will. But I’m so resistant to creating a similar work scenario, that I’ve felt the only acceptable option is to do something completely BIG and DIFFERENT. (Like give up my apartment and go to India and become a yoga teacher and travel indefinitely and let the universe take care of all the details.)
This desire for something completely different has created simultaneous excitement and pressure/conflict within. I love that things on this planet are so energetically charged…but I can see how this can create total resistance to the way things actually ARE, right now.
When I’m in this place of resistance, the sirens outside my window scream louder, the horns honk more aggressively, the neighbour’s floors creak relentlessly. I want to escape.
But by focusing on the need to overhaul my life completely, I magnify the negatives and miss out on the more subtle opportunities that could be right in front of me. Worse, I lose sight of my many blessings.
The morning birds help restore my sense of balance and perspective. Their faithful chirping reminds me, first thing every day, that there is such sweetness out there…and thus right here. Their hope and optimism for a new day is in me too. It is always available…and no amount of external change can substitute for finding it within. Wherever you go, there you are.
If I am a ‘divine changemaker’, it means I am someone who can find her centre of calm within chaos and (seeming) imperfection. Someone whose actions match her words, and whose words are based in integrity. Someone who doesn’t run when things get overwhelming.
It means being real about the habitual reactions, fears, and judgments that show up throughout the day. Because they still show up for me.
And you know what? I’m ok with it. Because I’m done with putting so much pressure on myself to do outwardly ‘big’ and ‘great’ things. I know that being conscious and remembering my heart is all I can ask of myself.
And I have the birds to sweetly sing me through it all.