from karma to dharma

Through completing the final session of my Kundalini Yoga teacher training program last weekend, it’s become clear that my views on karma have significantly changed these last few months. Karma used to have very negative connotations (mostly surrounding punishment), and my chronic thoughts about it hung over me like a heavy cloud.

In my very first training session last October, I was hesitant to wrap my hair in a white cloth. I knew many Kundalini Yogis wore turbans, and in all my years of practice, I never saw myself doing that. But after a few days, I began to question why I was so resistant. And, near the end of our five-day session, I wrapped my hair on the top of my head.

My beautiful training group. I'm on the right.

My beautiful training group. I’m on the right.

It was very emotional for me. As a child, I was desperate to hide the fact that I was Indian. I wanted nothing more than to be white. I did everything I could to blend in, which, being brown-skinned, never really worked.

My intense feelings of powerlessness and separation – of feeling inherently inferior in my brownness – had become, in my mind, my karma. I didn’t belong anywhere on this planet, and there was nothing I could do about it.

These past few months have taken me on a journey of discovering the jewels of my ancestry, and what it means to be a woman – an Indian woman – in this day and age. It has been one intense, beautiful roller coaster ride as I unearth emotions buried deep within me, and in my ancestral line. Planet Earth is reawakening to the Divine Feminine – we know this. What truths can I now speak, that my ancestors could not?

Wrapping my hair was symbolic; it marked a return to myself.

A new path is emerging, one my childhood self couldn’t see. I have renewed hope of living from the oneness of which I am a part. I understand that I can’t be separate, because there is no separation – no matter how convincing the illusion, the maya, appears. Of course, my ego has a hard time with this. It wants to stay separate…to believe I’m inferior or superior, but never the same.

Karma used to feel like a curse, a burden – but I now see it as a gift, in that I’m totally responsible for all my thoughts, actions, and reactions in this here-and-now. I can do my best to live from my highest truth and consciousness, and correct anything I feel needs correcting. That doesn’t mean I’m always successful or that I live in ‘love light bliss’ all the time. It means I do my best.

And instead of obsessing about karma, I can choose to live my dharma.

My dharma is my purpose. It is the guiding factor in my life. It remained elusive for many years, but I’m starting to see it now. It’s what I’ve been doing all along. My dharma is not a job or a business or a project or a baby or any ‘thing’ out there. It is within. It is transforming all those things I once hated about myself into sources of strength, beauty, and love – in service to all.

Words cannot express my gratitude for my teachers, friends, and the sacred Kundalini Yoga teachings. I bow in deep reverence. Sat Nam.

36 thoughts on “from karma to dharma

  1. When we begin to understand that the sense of being separate from others only exists artificially – that we create all the ways we justify ‘us vs them’ – the light comes on, yah? When this prevailing illusion begins to dissipate, we have to start questioning EVERYTHING. And what an adventure begins! And love really becomes possible.

    Liked by 1 person

    • YES! Once the light is switched on, it can be very hard to turn back. Well, I guess there are lots of ways to stay asleep 🙂 but it seems many of us are awakening…seeing all the un-truths we’ve been fed, and the mass illusion that seeps into every aspect of life. A grand adventure indeed! ❤ Thank you for visiting and commenting! Aleya

      Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks so much Laura! It was a transformative journey and I’m so grateful that I completed it. I hope you are doing very well and I look forward to reading more of your powerful words! Namaste ❤ Aleya

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I love how you describe dharma: “transforming all those things I once hated about myself into sources of strength, beauty, and love – in service to all.” This is something we can all aspire to.
    Congratulations on your teacher training! I hope to one day take class with you. xx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Aleya ❤

    I see you! You are over there on the right 🙂 Your smile shines so bright. That's the smile of Self.

    When you wrote, "What truths can I now speak, that my ancestors could not?" It hit me hard. Thank you. I have been working with this one for a while now. Let's see if something emerges.

    You are inspiring me, my friend! ❤ absolutely

    Ka

    Liked by 1 person

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